hi my darlings. thank u thank u thank u, for caring, consoling, tagging, hugging me aft wad happened in the last entry. i wanna thank everyone of u frm the bottom of my heart,
darling baobei, miss lala, na, nur, ave, kiak, ling, cheryl, sharon, etc. i love n appreciate every single one of u.this morning was disatrous, water based shit agian.
three times. my crm presentation was @10.20am and at 9.45 i was still in the toilet for the 3rd time. damn it. mum asked me not to go skool n there's no way i'm gonna do tht even if i haf to stay till the 5th time. was even doing my mk up when i was on the toilet bowl. oh man..
but the time i rushed to skool, it was 10.05am. before i went skool, i msg them i would be late. initally the 1st time i sent the 1st msg, then the 3rd time i sent another 2 more msgs syain tht i was hafin diahorea. smth tht made me v upset, "wah. u really one and a half hrs late." of everyone, i nv eva expect it coming frm her. i was totally upset, shocked n i said " i diahorea can? 3 times can?" sorry, i think i over-reacted. but i was alr damn flustered tht i was late. instead of helpin, i heard tht, it juz worsen the whole thing. i feel even more mang chang. and of all ppl, it was my best partner. best, n i mean really best partner. i mean, tht really din help at all at tht point of time. =s den ran here n ther for a comp when i couldnt find a comp to read the report again and no q-cards.
while searching for a comp i almost broke down into tears. and when i found one it juz couldnt read the thumb drive. when i finally printed stuff i wanted n read it brieftly it was 10.30am. saw sharon chang, hugged and this time when she asked"u ok? wad happened to u?" den i realised actually my face has showed it all. i started tearing. n my hair was in a mess. den come cheryl askin me the same thing n there it was bursting all out.
Den told myself, pull urself together u can do this. went to the toilet, tied my hair n cleaned my red nose n eyes. the presentation i tot on the other hand was the best for me so far coz i really din stumbled on my wrds n used no q cards at all. Miss ng seems good abt it. i really hope she was coz so far the rest of the grp, she commented almost everyone "good, v good." she actually still said it was well prepared. wahaha. n the slides were well done. i noe coz all along i tot so. good job dear!
To my best partner: thank u so much so stayin up late all dayzz wif me completing all of them. but i really muz tk this opp to tell u some things tht i've been hiding frm u.
actually, ther were times tht i was hurt by wad u said. or mayb u felt i deserved it. but i really nit to tell u openly. i dunno how else but i actually told cheryl n sharon todae. tht explains wad i told u on msn todae. i dunno if u rmbr there was once u said "asshole" straight into my face n was really unhappy on a few occasions or juz bad mood or stressed up tht u said certain things tht really hit me. sometimes, we luff it away. yes, but sometimes it hit me kinda bad. when i got home n tot abt it, got quite dejected n demoralised abt myself. tht i sometimes couldnt achieve wad u wanted or u tot i would noe abt certain tings tht i actually don n i asked.
i mean i can really understand on some occasions u r really pek cek n stressed up which explains ur mood or tone. but juz hope to share these i had all along wif you. i still love u as much. thank u so much for listening, pasta-mania-ing, bitching, loving, writing cards to me, doing such nice slide shows and photo-taking wif me. i love ya. really do still. i hope we'll work again in the near future. hugs*
